Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
Randomize
