wat bout pragnant strippers??
Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Randomize
