I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
Literally the only clue I have to try and figure out my blackout adventures is a draft on twitter that just says "Mummies alive!"
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
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