haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
Today I met the neighbor that shares my bedroom wall. When I pointed out my unit, he said, "Oh, that's you? Oh... that's you." I didn't think much of it until I was in bed tonight and I heard him clear his throat. He's. Heard. Everything.
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
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