I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
Randomize
