whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
Randomize
