So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
Randomize
