Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
Randomize