when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
It's 5AM and I just stirred weed butter into ramen noodles. This is not where I expected to be at 30. ...But, hey, getting high off noodles.
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
Randomize
