hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
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