it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
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