you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Randomize
