mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
Randomize
