She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
how do you say “i know we haven’t hung out in a month, but i gave myself an amazing orgasm to your picture the other day” without coming on too strong
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