Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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