I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
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