I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
True strength comes from lack of pants
Randomize
