Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
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