She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
Houston, we have a blender
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize
