I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
