entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
