Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
Randomize
