he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
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