Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
No I am not eating basil off your cock
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
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