put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Randomize