She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
Randomize
