Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Randomize
