This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
Randomize
