new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
are you so shy because you have an std?
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
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