i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
When did we convert life to cartoon?
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
Had a dream last night that we survived the apocalypse. And we celebrated Christmas.
What did I get you?
A 12 gauge and a bottle of vodka that was waist high.
Sounds about right
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