u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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