Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(636): View more from Missouri

Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.

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(902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.

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(708): View more from Illinois

I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.

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(301): View more from Maryland

Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed

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(310): View more from California

Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?

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(720): View more from Colorado

me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling

(303): View more from Colorado

Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper

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(410): View more from Maryland

I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house

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(832): View more from Houston, Texas

I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.

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(786): View more from Florida

at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.

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