let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
I didn't notice because vodka
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
Randomize
