garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
My friend's 9-year-old son just informed me that for a cop station, you can't use a shotgun; you have to use a machine gun. Thank you, Grand Theft Auto, for single-handedly corrupting our youth.
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
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