Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
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