she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
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