why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Randomize
