allegedly i woke up at 5am sat in the dishwasher and peed
I forgot how hot balto sounded
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
Randomize
