I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
Randomize
