shit! I think I may have lost something in your car. Look for anything that can possibly belong to me, especially look out for a pair of pink panties in a ziplock. I lost my spare and you better find it before someone else does.
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Randomize
