Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
In America we eat man semen.
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
