North Korea, Best Korea!
I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
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