She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
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