his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
