Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
I woke up with semen in my invisalign. My molars were just marinating in it
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
Randomize
