May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
lets start a swedish sibling band together
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
Randomize