i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
Randomize
