Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
Randomize
