Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(323): View more from California

forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell

(310): View more from California

my version of bright and sunny.

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(281): View more from Texas

I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.

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(303): View more from Colorado

marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex

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(803): View more from South Carolina

I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.

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(315): View more from New York

We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"

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(561): View more from Florida

This is the prime rib incident all over again

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(701): View more from North Dakota

So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster

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(509): View more from Washington

I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.

(609): View more from New Jersey

That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?

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(314): View more from Missouri

Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick

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