Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
Randomize
